Friday, September 27, 2002

 
AN ARM OR A LEG?
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Did you catch the season premiere of E.R. last night? That one scene-- you know which one I'm talking about-- completely took my breath away. I can't stop thinking about how fragile we all are.

Anyway, at one point two of the doctors started playing "This or That", only with some real teeth to it. Here it is from memory, with my answers.

I should warn you that some of this gets a little bit gruesome.

Would you rather lose a toe or a finger?
A toe, of course. You can have all ten toes before I give you one finger.

Would you rather lose an arm or a leg?
A leg. I'd miss working out, but I could still get around with a prosthetic, and people would hardly notice. If I lost an arm, I think that would make me a freak. I think nobody I don't already know would ever look me in the eye again.

Would you rather be deaf or blind?
Deaf. I listen to books on tape all the time, as it is. While I would miss that if I were deaf, I already know what it's like to go through most of my life shutting out most external noise. I guess it would make it hard to talk, but it seems like many people who become deaf later in life do not lose their power of speech. And I'd still have the whole Internet, which I'd pretty much lose if I were blind, along with my ability to take care of myself in basic ways.

Would you rather lose both arms or your penis?
That would be a really tough choice, and I'm sure I'd have big problems with depression no matter which I picked. But in the end I'd have to say a fond goodbye to my penis. What would I get to do with it without any arms, anyway? Maybe if I were already married, and I knew my wife would stay with me no matter what, then my answer would be different. Obviously, this question only applies to men, but it's easy enough to change it around to apply to a woman.

Here's some questions that were NOT on the show, but that I've thought about.

Would you rather lose your ability to hear music or your ability to hear speech?
I'd much rather lose my ability to hear music. I like music, but if I never heard it again, I don't think it would really change my life that much. But if I couldn't communicate with other people, that would change everything about my life. Yet, every person I've asked this to says they'd rather lose their ability to hear speech. I find that impossible to fathom.

If you are heterosexual, would you rather have sex with a dog of the opposite sex or a human of your same sex?
Every guy I've ever asked this picks the dog. Every woman always picks the person. I'm no exception.

And here's one I just thought of, that's actually got me a little stumped:
If you are male, would you rather lose a finger or one of your testicles?
I keep going back and forth. Losing a testicle somewhat decreases my ability to reproduce, and it deprives me of a back-up if something happens to the other one. I suppose some potential mates might notice, and might object. But, more likely than not, it would have no real effect on me at all. Losing a finger would be noticeable to almost everyone I meet, and might really creep a lot of people out. Also, depending on the finger, it might have some serious functional difficulties, and almost any finger would make it harder for me to type or play the piano or guitar. I guess my answer is going to be that it depends on the finger. I won't spare my thumbs, or my index fingers, and I wont spare the middle finger of my right hand (I need it to write), even at the cost of a testicle. But I'll give up either pinky, either ring finger, or the the middle finger of my left hand.

If you'd like to answer these probing questions on your blog, here they are. I don't have a comment section, but I promise that if you do it, and you write to me, I'll put a whole, proper blog entry about it here, along with a link. My e-mail address is david@danzig.comDELETETHISPART. Delete the part that says "DELETETHISPART". That's to foil spammers who are harvesting e-mail addresses.

Would you rather lose a toe or a finger?
Would you rather lose an arm or a leg?
Would you rather be deaf or blind?
Would you rather lose both arms or your genitalia?
Would you rather lose your ability to hear music or your ability to hear speech?
If you are heterosexual, would you rather have sex with a dog of the opposite sex or a human of your same sex?
If you are male, would you rather lose a finger or one of your testicles?

This is The Official Record. 9:13 AM
link to this item: http://www.creamy.com/blog/2002/09/arm-or-leg.html


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