Wednesday, March 31, 2004

 
WHO'S ON BUSH?
External link:

I wrote this the other day. I think it's a little rough, but I really think it's a great idea for something. I'd just love to see how they'd handle it if you tried to say it on TV.

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A: Well B, I'm going to Washington. You know, the Presidential administration gave me a job as a political consultant.

B: Look A, if you're their political consutlant, you must know the names of all the leaders.

A: I certainly do.

B: Well you know I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's running the country.

A: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these politicians nowadays very peculiar names.

B: Well, what's the President's name?

A: Oh, I like Bush.

B: I do, too. But what's the President's name?

A: I just told you his name.

B: You just said you like Bush.

A: I certainly do.

B: Well, so do I, but what's the President's name?

A: You just said it!

B: I thought we were talking about Bush!

A: We are.

B: But I want to talk about the President.

A: Bush?

B: No the President!

A: You mean Bush?

B: No, I mean the President!

A: Uh, Bush.

B: Alright, alright, never mind. Does this President have a Vice President?

A: Of course.

B: Do you know him personally.

A: Oh, I don't know Dick.

B: That's how it seems to me.

A: Why, do you know him?

B: I don't even know his name.

A: I just told you his name.

B: What??!? You just told me you don't know anything.

A: Oh, I know I don't really like him very much.

B: And the name of this dick?

A: Exactly.

B: Exactly?

A: Exactly.

B: So the Vice President's name is Exactly?

A: No, Dick.

B: Hey, all I want is the fellow's name!

A: Dick.

B: Are you trying to start something?

A: I'm trying to tell you the fellow's name, Dick.

B: Well then just tell it to me, cocksucker!

A: Dick!

B: Stop calling me names, and tell me the Vice President's name!

A: Dick! Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick, Dick!

B: You know what? Why don't you just stick it up your colon?

A: What did you say?

B: I said stick it up your colon!

A: Oh, that's our Secretary of State!

BOTH: GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY!

This is The Official Record. 7:30 PM
link to this item: http://www.creamy.com/blog/2004/03/whos-on-bush.html


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LAST WEEKEND.
External link: http://silentlaughter.com/

On Friday, I had lunch with my Cousin Michael and my first cousin once removed Howard, and all their children.

Friday night, I saw Silent Laughter with Jin K.

On Saturday, I went to the Children's Museum of the Arts in SoHo with my cousin Michael, his wife Stephanie, and their twin children, Nick and Sabrina, and my cousin Barry, his wife Sara, and their younger two children, Joshua and Kayla

Saturday night, I had dinner at Hakata and had a drink with Alan B.

Sunday, I had Brunch at Town, with Manny F. and Mai X. Then we all went to the grand opening of the new Queenscenter mall in Queens, and had dinner at Red Lobster in the mall.

This is The Official Record. 4:45 PM
link to this item: http://www.creamy.com/blog/2004/03/last-weekend.html


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TIVO TIP
External link: http://www.tivo.com/

I've lately been TiVoing a lot of silent movies, and then watching them in triple speed, since there's nothing to hear. A lot of Charlie Chaplin movies are only about 45 minutes to start with, so I can get through one in 15 minutes without missing a thing.

To find silent movies with your TiVo, do a wishlist for keyword "silent" and category "Movies." You can also specify a sub-category, such as comedy or whatever. But don't auto-record them, because then you'll get movies with "silent" in the name or description, as well as silent movies.

This is The Official Record. 4:03 PM
link to this item: http://www.creamy.com/blog/2004/03/tivo-tip.html


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THEATER REVIEW: SILENT LAUGHTER * * 1/2 (2 and a half stars out of 4).
External link: http://silentlaughter.com/

This was a very clever idea that could have been done better. The idea is that none of the actors speak, and there are no sound effects. Plus, all the costumes, sets, and props are all black and white. It's a very cute idea, and really original and different. And it was funny and entertaining, but not as much as a really good old silent movie. Plus, they really over-used the dialogue printed on the screen. A real silent movie typically has no more than a hundred words of dialogue, but this had more like a thousand or so. If they're just going to have an ordinary conversation, then what's the point of making it silent, anyway?

This is The Official Record. 4:00 PM
link to this item: http://www.creamy.com/blog/2004/03/theater-review-silent-laughter-12-2.html


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MOVIE REVIEW: EUROTRIP (2004) * * * 1/2 (3 and a half stars out of 4).
External link: http://www.eurotrip-themovie.com/

I was expecting very little from this movie, which I only saw because it was about to start just as Andy M. and I were walking by the theater. But I laughed and laughed again and again at this very funny movie. Be warned: there is quite a lot of gratuitous nudity in this movie, both male and female.

This is The Official Record. 3:53 PM
link to this item: http://www.creamy.com/blog/2004/03/movie-review-eurotrip-2004-12-3-and.html


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MOVIE REVIEW: ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND (2004) * * * (3 stars out of 4).
External link: http://www.eternalsunshine.com/

The new Jim Carrey/Kate Winslet high-budget art film, written by Charlie Kaufman takes a bizarre premise, but doesn't bring on any too-clever twists and turns. It is about a product that lets you erase your memories of your relationship with someone that you'd rather forget. I suppose its a criticism of the current trend of taking a pill when you are depressed instead of dealing with your memories and feelings the old-fashioned way. In the end, I am left with a serious question about the plot, that I think is a problem on their end. I left it in the comments section, so only look at that if you've already seen the movie.

This is The Official Record. 3:44 PM
link to this item: http://www.creamy.com/blog/2004/03/movie-review-eternal-sunshine-of.html


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Saturday, March 27, 2004

 
MY BROTHER'S WEDDING.
External link: http://weddings.theknot.com/pwp/view/co_main.aspx?coupleid=103774213006520

Sorry for the delay in posting. Anyway, my brother's wedding was beautiful. As best man, I had make a toast, which I was very nervous about, until I gave it, when it went smoothly, and I was finally able to relax. I won't bore you with the whole toast, but some people told me they thought the opening was cute. I said, "I think it's been really unfair to Greg, having me as a brother. In any other family, everybody would have called Greg 'the smart one.' Instead, he grew up in the only family where he could be the emotionally well-balanced one." The other toasts were at least as touching as mine, and the whole affair was just spectacular. There was this amazing ice sculpture of a couple of dachshunds leaning against a table, and atop the ice table was a martini bar, including a bowl of ice, where the bowl itself was made of the single piece of ice that comprised the sculpture. The food was top notch, with too many top notch items to list all of them, though the sushi and the steak were both exceptional, and I'm not a big steak fan in general. The dessert deserves a special mention, as it might have been the best dessert I ever had. It was ice-cream in a warm fudge chocolate cookie crust that I am failing adequately to describe. The ceremony itself was lovely, with several cute, untraditional touches, such as asking seven guests/couples to each give a blessing. Mine was, "may you be blessed with wonderful children who make you very proud." Plus, all my cousins' children who were old enough to walk marched down the aisle at the beginning of the ceremony. That was fifteen children walking, plus another four pre-toddlers. Plus, their dog, Katie (a tiny mini-dachshund) marched down the aisle as well, in a doggie-bridesmaid gown. Oh, and I've never seen so many roses in one place before, including florist shops and rose gardens.

The whole wedding weekend was filled with non-stop family activities for both sides' huge extended families who came together for the celebration, and other close friends. On Thursday night Greg and Rachel (oh that's my brother and sister in law's names, by the way) rented ten lanes at a bowling alley for everyone, which was a lot of fun with the many, many young children. Friday was the rehearsal, plus the rehearsal dinner at Dave and Buster's which has surprisingly good food. There was also a show, in which a few fun-loving couples played a version of the Newlywed game. Saturday was the wedding, of course. Then Sunday was a lovely out-door buffet brunch at my parents' house, with live entertainment for the all the kids. It was also my "sister-in-law-in-law's" (i.e., Rachel's sister's) birthday, so I made sure we got a cake for that, too.

Greg and Rachel missed the brunch, because they left that morning for their honeymoon in Hawaii. They just got back yesterday.

This is The Official Record. 7:23 PM
link to this item: http://www.creamy.com/blog/2004/03/my-brothers-wedding.html


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Thursday, March 11, 2004

 
I'M BACK.
External link:

I just got back from Florida, where I went for my brother's wedding. More to come on that.

This is The Official Record. 5:00 PM
link to this item: http://www.creamy.com/blog/2004/03/im-back.html


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Monday, March 01, 2004

 
IDIOT!
External link: http://quizilla.com/users/official/quizzes/Just%20what%20kind%20of%20an%20idiot%20are%20you%3F

You are a BUFFOON. Why must you always be the
center of attention? Don't you know you're
making an ass of yourself?


Just What Kind of an Idiot are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

This is The Official Record. 2:30 AM
link to this item: http://www.creamy.com/blog/2004/03/idiot.html


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